Cowboy to the Core Read online

  “That isn’t true. She’s crazy about Dane. Being in love is not like loving a pet.”

  A dreamy smile crossed McKenna’s face, and Jamie knew that she was thinking about Grant. Likely thinking about sex with Grant.

  And Jamie had to wonder how many times that same look had come across McKenna’s face before, and whether Jamie just hadn’t noticed. If she’d been too blind to see. She probably had been.

  She hadn’t understood that.

  “Did you...? Did being with Grant make you like things you didn’t used to like?”

  She was thinking about Beatrix and the beer.

  McKenna blinked. “I... Is that a sex question?”

  Jamie’s mouth flew open. “No. I have no sex questions about you with my brother. None at all.”

  “I didn’t think so, but I thought in the interest of sharing information, I should check.”

  Except now Jamie was curious. Against her will. She was not going to follow that on. “No. It’s just... Beatrix mentioned that Dane had gotten her into drinking beer. Beatrix didn’t used to drink beer at all. She obviously does it because of him. You’re going to the rodeo with Grant. So I guess that kind of answers my own question.”

  McKenna laughed. “I moved to a ranch to be with Grant. Well, I guess I moved to the ranch first. But I’m staying on the ranch because of Grant. He’s definitely changed me.”

  “Does that bother you?”

  “No,” McKenna said. “Being with him has... My life wasn’t easy before I came here. I mean... Everyone’s life is hard, so I’m not trying to be all sob story about it, but it was tough. I had a pretty thick sheet of armor all wrapped around me. Nothing could get in and hurt me. But nothing could get in and heal me, either. And until him... I didn’t care about that. But I wanted to let him in. Because I wanted to be the kind of woman that was worthy of a man like him. Honestly, Jamie...you have no idea what a strong, wonderful man he is. And he would never want me to go talking about all that. Because of course he doesn’t like attention and recognition, either.”

  “Do you have secrets with him, too?”

  “That’s the nature of intimate relationships. I mean, that is the thing about sex, Jamie. It’s intimate. I spent a long time pretending that it didn’t have to be. But it doesn’t just move things around in your body. It shifts them in your soul. For better or worse. It’s kind of a mirror of what happens in a real relationship. You want to do things that you would ordinarily think were crazy, because it’s...him. Physically and emotionally, those things are true.”

  Jamie blinked. “Well, love sounds overrated.”

  “I would say that it’s not,” McKenna said. “In fact, I would say that we as a culture have bizarrely underrated it.”

  “I have to take your word for that.”

  Letting someone under your armor. That was the most terrifying thing Jamie could think of. And even though McKenna was happy now, Jamie couldn’t think of anything she would like less.

  She had absolutely no inclination toward that.

  But even as she rejected it, what McKenna said made a strange kind of sense. Because she thought about the way that Gabe touched her, and how when she was with him, when she was in the moment, it didn’t just seem sexy, it seemed necessary.

  And if she were told cold, when she was just standing in an arena with no tingle between her thighs, that it would feel good to have a man touch her between the legs, and suck on her breasts, she would have crossed her arms over her chest and recoiled slightly.

  But Gabe made her crazy. A special brand of it. And whatever he did...it seemed right.

  Gabe seemed right.

  But the armor thing didn’t.

  “Hey,” Gabe said, loping up to the fence, his cowboy hat pulled low over his eyes, his movements mesmerizing for Jamie.

  McKenna shot her a glance, and made a skeptical sound. “Yep. Nothing?”

  Jamie treated McKenna to a wide grin, stretching straight across her face, with no curve at all, and a whole lot of teeth. “Hi,” she said to Gabe, pulling her focus off McKenna.

  “Are you ready to ride?”

  “Yes,” she said.

  “You should give McKenna a show, too.”

  “Hopefully, it won’t be a show of me falling off the horse again.”

  “Definitely,” Gabe said, his expression suddenly getting stony.

  “You’re going to rush into place and catch me if I start to fall, right?” she asked. “Because I seem to recall that last time you felt that had you been here, you would have prevented it.”

  “Get your smart ass up on the horse, Jamie,” he said. Then she went off to do just that.

  * * *

  GABE FELT HIS sister’s gaze burning into the side of his face.

  “Don’t bullshit me, Dalton.”

  He kept his eyes on Jamie, and resolutely not on McKenna. “Why not, Tate?”

  “Soon to be Dodge,” McKenna said. “And don’t forget it. The same last name as the girl you’re currently fooling around with.”

  He looked off in the distance where Jamie was tightening the girth on her horse’s saddle. “I’m not fooling around with her.”

  “You are sleeping with her, though.”

  “Why do you think that?”

  “Because I’m clairvoyant.” He drew back and looked at her, his eyes wide. “I’m not clairvoyant, you idiot. But I know Jamie. She seems different. In the way she looks at you... You two have secret smiles. Secret smiles between men and women tend to mean there’s been nudity.”

  “First of all, I didn’t believe you were clairvoyant, not for a minute. I was a little concerned you might believe you were. Second, I’m not messing around with her,” he reiterated.

  “I believe you,” she said. “But what are you doing?”

  He lifted a shoulder. “Enjoying myself.”

  McKenna responded slowly. “And I can see that she’s enjoying it, too.”

  “I think so.”

  She assessed him and didn’t speak, but there was a funny smile playing around the edge of her mouth, and he wanted to tell her not to get ideas.

  Jamie got up on the horse, then went to the edge of the entrance to the arena. And when she and the horse let fly, it was incredible to see.

  Jamie practically stood, working her legs up and down in time with the horse, her incredible control around each curve amazing. And he knew exactly how all those muscles in her body felt. How it looked when she was naked.

  She’d earned all that athletic, toned beauty, and it was on display here. And giving him a hell of a rush.

  Jamie finished off the course, and Gabe stuck two fingers in his mouth and whistled.

  McKenna clapped next to him, shaking her head. “Even if I didn’t know Jamie so well, I would know there was something going on, because you can’t handle yourself watching her like that. You’re so into her it’s hilarious.”

  His knee-jerk reaction to that was anger. She was being nosy and she didn’t have the right to be. What was happening between him and Jamie was between him and Jamie.

  “Look, you can be judgmental if you want. And you can talk about how predictable I am, and how Wyatt was afraid this would happen, and his suspicions were unfounded, or whatever. But whatever you think... McKenna, being around Jamie reminds me of what it was like to care about things.”

  He hadn’t meant to say that. It was more revealing than he’d have liked it to be.

  “Because you’re older than she is,” McKenna said. “So she reminds you of being young.”

  He scowled. “Maybe.” Hell, maybe that was it. Maybe she reminded him of his twenties. He didn’t think that was it, though. “Also, I’m thirty-three. I’m eight years older than she is. That’s not that insane.”

  “All right, I’ll quit making fun of you.”

&nbs
p; “Thank you,” he said.

  “Great job,” McKenna shouted as Jamie approached where they were standing.

  “Thanks,” Jamie said.

  “I haven’t gotten to the reason I’m here yet,” McKenna said.

  “And that is?”

  “Wyatt wants to do a little rodeo show for the guests. Even Dane is going to do something. Next weekend.”

  “Oh, yeah?” Gabe asked.

  “And, well, he figured Jamie would barrel race. But he sent me to ask you if you would provide us with a steer wrestle and a saddle bronc ride.”

  Gabe was surprised by the invitation. “Yeah, I can do that. Dane doesn’t want to ride the bronco?”

  “Dane is going to do some steer wrestling. Grant is going to team rope with Dallas. Apparently, that’s Grant’s one rodeo skill. I’m very much looking forward to seeing it.”

  “It’s not that impressive,” Jamie said. “There’s a reason he never competed.”

  McKenna lifted her brows. “I don’t know. I think your brother has pretty good rope skills.”

  “Can you not?” Gabe said, his tone dry. “Please.”

  She grinned, and he knew that Jamie had missed the inference she was making.

  “Well,” McKenna said. “I will leave you to the rest of your...chores. See you around.” She patted Gabe on the shoulder and sauntered off, setting herself like a cat in the sunbeam. Likely over the fact that she had managed to pry the truth out of him, even if it was all through implication.

  “What’s with her?” Jamie asked.

  “She knows,” he said.

  Jamie swore violently. “She’s nosy.”

  “Yeah, she is. And way too damn perceptive. I’m not bothered by it.”

  Jamie blinked. “I’m not bothered by it. Especially not if you aren’t.”

  “Nope,” he said.

  “Well, that’s good,” she said.

  “I’m not worried about McKenna. And this rodeo thing will give us something fun to work on over the next couple of days.”

  “True. Hey, I bet you can use one of the horses here for steer wrestling. That would probably be just about right.”

  “What do you think about Gus?” he asked.

  She considered it. “I think he’d do fine.”

  “As long as I’m not an idiot?”

  A softness touched the corner of Jamie’s mouth. “Yeah. Especially then.”

  “You’ll have to help me.”

  “I think I can handle that.”

  CHAPTER TWENTY

  GABE HAD SPENT the better part of the week training with Jamie for the rodeo, which had been more fun than he had doing any kind of rodeo work for a long time. He wasn’t thinking about his own enjoyment, about winning. He was thinking about putting on a good show for the guests at Get Out of Dodge, and enjoying honing his steer-wrestling skills, which were not great.

  But Jamie had said that he looked sexy holding a rope in his mouth, so it had given him a little bit more impetus to try more rounds than he might have otherwise.

  It had all been going well. Jamie didn’t spend the night at his place every night—her rationale that her family would get suspicious—but every so often he was able to entice her to stay into the early hours before she sneaked back home for breakfast.

  They had also been working on figuring out all the logistics for getting permits, certifications and various assorted licenses they would need to bring the kids on board.

  Fortunately, Ellie had some insight into that kind of thing as a teacher who had often worked in special programs. And now all that was left was to talk to Hank.

  Gabe wasn’t sure how ready he was to have the conversation. Not with the strange anger he felt toward his father so close to the surface of his skin these days.

  All these changes in him, changes that had started months ago, changes that had gotten stronger, more pronounced because of Jamie, were propelling him in strange ways that he didn’t understand.

  The issues with his dad were just a part of that.

  So he wasn’t exactly sure of what was going to come out of his mouth, not even as he knocked on his dad’s office door.

  His parents’ house was truly something else. With longhorns from big-ass, Texan bulls mounted above the doorways, scarred wood framing them in, reclaimed pieces of barn every which way, and framed belt buckles, rattlesnake detailing and carpets made of cowhide and leather with brass detail everywhere you looked. He knew exactly what he’d see in his father’s office. More of the same, and then some. Cowboy kitsch like you wouldn’t believe.

  Poor man’s luxury. Basically.

  And really, it was Gabe’s reference point for luxury.

  He’d remembered thinking that his father’s office was the coolest place in the world. And when his dad told him to come in, and he opened the door, he could remember being a boy.

  He could remember idolizing his old man. And not really understanding the screaming fights that he and his mother had.

  He could remember looking up at that weathered face as he sat behind his desk, doing God knew what. Managing endorsements and things, Gabe supposed now, but at the time he hadn’t known, and he hadn’t asked.

  There were old lariats hanging on the wall with labels, braided rawhide and leather. Each one carrying a hefty price tag. And a jackalope with antlers and bird feet.

  “What brings you by?” Hank asked.

  “I came to have a talk with you. About the future of the ranch.”

  “Well, don’t you sound grave?” Hank pushed his hat back on his head and gave Gabe a speculative look.

  “I’m not meaning to.”

  “You’ve had a tone with me for the past few months now. Care to share what that’s about?”

  Gabe closed his eyes for a second. And he lost that sense of how he’d seen his dad as a boy. Lost that image of that larger-than-life cowboy who was everything a kid could ever hope to become.

  Hank had been such a mythical figure when Gabe was young, traveling for a lot of the year. It had only added to that intense sense of pride and awe that he had felt whenever Hank looked his way.

  And then he’d started realizing why his mother was crying after she and Daddy had a fight.

  And he’d started to understand the ways that Hank had hurt her.

  Not with fists. No, Hank Dalton would never leave bruises on a woman.

  Because Hank Dalton would never hurt anyone on purpose.

  And sometimes... Sometimes Gabe found that much harder to deal with.

  An asshole who went around using his fists on people...that was easy.

  You used your fists right back, and added a steel-toed boot for good measure. It was easy to deal with someone who was a bully.

  But a man with a ready grin and an easy wink? That was a whole different situation.

  A man who killed your dreams to get better for you, not just to hurt you, he was hard to hate.

  “I want to turn the ranch into a school,” Gabe said, not making small talk.

  “What?”

  “I want to give troubled boys a place to work, a place to learn skills. I want to work with CPS to find homes locally for them to stay at, and we can have a work and school program here. We can get grants from the state, and from the Fed. And we can also get funding as an alternative school. It’s something that Ellie is looking into. It won’t be a moneymaker, but it’s what I want to do. And if you don’t support me doing it here, you’ll have to find someone else to run the ranch...or I’ll buy you out.”

  Hank thought for a long moment, then looked up at Gabe with faded blue eyes. “I don’t know why you think you have to come to me presenting ultimatums,” he said.

  “Because I know you don’t support me doing this.”

  “What exactly is...this? We’ve never discussed us
ing the ranch as a school.”

  “You never wanted me to be a rancher. You didn’t want me to work with horses. But it’s what I am. I believe in the land, and I believe in the animals. I believe they have the power to heal people. To give people a sense of purpose. I’m not going to hold that in. I want to share it. I can go out there and I can compete...for how many more years? I don’t even know. Not many. And it’s empty. The only thing it fills is my wallet. And I’m done with that. I’m done with that kind of living. Maybe you can’t understand that, but I don’t need you to understand. I just need for you to not be in my way.”

  “This is about me selling your horses?”

  “Selling my horses. In general, being an unsupportive tool about my choices.”

  “That was a long time ago,” Hank said. “It would be nice if you didn’t assume I’m still who I was then. I’ve changed a lot in the past decade and a half, and you know it. I’ve done my damnedest to do what’s right. To do what’s right for this family, to do better by your mother. I’m trying to be a better man, Gabe. And at a certain point you have to let me. Your mother forgave me. You can’t just punish me forever. And if you want to do that, then maybe you should just cut me off. Do your ranching somewhere else.”

  “I don’t want to not have a relationship with you,” Gabe said. “I think that’s pretty clear. I could have gone off on my own a long time ago.”

  “You want to be angry at me about all kinds of sins I’ve committed, and I get it. But I’ve changed who I am. I have. What I did to you back then? It was a shitty thing to do. I’m sorry. I don’t blame you for running off to the rodeo angry with me. But you did well. So I never went after you. I thought you were happy.”

  Gabe opened his mouth to tell his father that he hadn’t been, but that was a lie. He’d found quite a bit of happiness at the rodeo, the attention, the sex...the money. It was all good. And he felt guilty about the enjoyment because of what he thought it symbolized. Especially when he was only supposed to be going out there to punish his dad.

  “I found a way to be. But only after going through a lot of shit. And I still didn’t do what you wanted me to.”